I apologize for being MIA for the last week or so, but it's become increasingly difficult for me to meet my Thursday post goal. I have a lot going on right now with the holidays fast approaching and my education on the line, so unfortunately blogging hasn't been my top priority. I haven't really been in the best mood and a lot has been getting me down lately. I'm also very VERY behind in TV, (I've only been keeping up with
Once Upon a Time at this point since it's the only one I can watch when it airs on Sundays). I'll explain...
As you know, I've been doing a year-long internship through my university at a local high school in the English department. So far it's been an upward struggle, with my health declining and issues with overall teaching performance. At this point, I've been given my class back and have been teaching mostly on my own for the last few weeks. Unfortunately I have not been as successful as I would like to be at this point. I'm still having noticeable issues with classroom management and the delivery of lessons. I always think that I'm doing better than I actually am, which has hindered my progress. Because of my substituting background, I've noticed that I tend to deliver lessons directly and methodically with little to no real explanation or real-world connection. I need to work harder at humanizing the lessons for my students and making sure that we're using discussion adequately in class instead of just going through the motions. I also need to start pulling the trigger with discipline. I have a bunch of kids who talk over me during class and I need to take care of that as soon as possible before I lose them. I wasn't expecting to have as much difficulty with this as I have been, but the reality is that my future is on the line at this point. I'm not getting credit for this first semester until I prove myself worthy, so I really have to step it up and make these next few weeks count. Luckily I still have some time, but I've been feeling really discouraged lately and uninspired. My lack of progress and apparent noncompliance with the regulations set down by the program have made me doubt my abilities and it's really stressing me out, to be blunt. Hopefully I can get my shit together soon or I'll be looking at repeating the internship next year and adding another year of school to my already mounting college debt. I understand what's at stake and that's not making me any less anxious and stressed, but maybe that's what I need. I don't want to panic, but I might be by the end of Christmas vacation, which is not what I want. Keep your fingers crossed for me that I make it out of this alive and worth certifying, or I'm going to be looking for a new career path when it's too late...
Besides the obvious problems I'm having with teaching, I really don't have a lot going on. We recently moved, (another reason I haven't been on top of the blog lately), and have been unpacking for the last few weeks as we get settled in. So far it's been really nice and comfortable and I really appreciate where we live now. I don't come home to an empty, cold apartment and I have access to a great kitchen stocked with food, so I really can't complain. Having animals again has been nice too! Money has also been less of an issues, at least on my end, and I've been working on saving as much as I can already and reorganizing my finances so they fit my new needs. My project for this weekend is finishing reorganizing my filing crate so I can fit all my bills, paperwork and other things in one accessible spot. It's also been nice to have some extra help and expertise with these types of things because most of the time, when it comes to budgets and other adult things, I have NO idea what I'm doing yet. Still trying to figure out a new routine for our new space, but so far I think we're settling in nicely and everything will eventually feel more natural.
I'm looking forward to the holiday break mostly. Next week is my birthday week, so I have that to look forward to. I'm turning 25, which for some people is a big deal, but I feel like it'll just be another birthday for me. I don't really know what age I actually feel like; sometimes I feel like I'm still 18 and other times I feel like I'm 30, so 25 should be interesting. The following week there's a day and a half of school before break starts Wednesday. After that, we don't come back until January 5th. It will be nice to spend more time with my family and hopefully put the worries I have about my teaching future out of my mind for a few weeks. My little sister is flying home from Texas on Saturday and I can't wait to see her! Spending the holidays with family is greater than any gift I could receive. It took me a long time to realize what Christmas should be about and I'm glad that we get to see everyone from both sides and spend a little time with each family. It's worth it to me and that's all I really need. That and lots of great food:)
Once Upon a Time was really emotional last weekend! I wasn't expecting what happened, and I love when shows do that because it keeps you on your toes. With the last few episodes being very straightforward and predictable, it was nice to see a change. I was getting pretty sick of the crazy family-hungry snow queen thing and it was heartbreaking to find out her sister really regretted her actions form the past. The last time we saw that bottle was the very beginning of the season, so I had been curious to see what she had written in the letter, but I hadn't expected that. I also wasn't expecting the flashbacks to Emma's past and the fact that Ingrid was very close to adopting her. I can understand why Ingrid took Emma's memories upon her arrival to Storybrooke. Now that the curse has been lifted due to Ingrid sacrificing herself, everything seems to be back to normal. But wait! Rumple is STILL a conniving bastard! For next week's mid-season finale, I'm predicting Rumple attempting to take over the world one more time and get that dagger off his back, someone finding out about him lying to everyone, spreading that around and it getting back to Emma, who will have to stop him with the help of everyone else in town. Elsa and Anna will probably help too before they go back to Arendelle to return those memories. I'm hoping we at least see the Sorcerer or something because we've kind of taken a back-seat to the whole "author of the book" mystery, so that's the only other curiosity I had. We'll see what happens, but I anticipate a lot of Rumple hatred next week.
That's all I have for you this week. I had to take some time and write this during school so I don't leave you guys hanging again. I'm not sure if there will be continuous posts from me every week, but I will try to post at least one more time before Christmas break starts. Hopefully I'll have some good updates for you. Until next time, I remain your faithful correspondent.
